In a regarding rom-coms, fairy tales, and social media hashtags like #relationshipgoals, it can be simple to idealize human relationships. But even though every partnership is unique, there are several common characteristics that can help you tell whether the relationship is normally healthy. We spoke with two therapists—registered psychotherapist Natacha Fight it out, MA, RP and Disputa Eshilian-Oates, LMSW, founder of Mind Physique and Heart by DiLeonardo Wellness—to find out what they believe are some signals that you’re in a healthier relationship.

A healthy romance is based on mutual respect. It means that you and your spouse respect every other’s individual passions, needs, and boundaries. Additionally, it means that you don’t hold one another to a typical that is impossible to meet—if, for example , you’re not a fan of a particular music genre, that is certainly fine, but your significant other should never try to change your tastes to fit theirs.

Your partner as well shows concern in your life outside the relationship and doesn’t assume that your well-being will depend on entirely built in. They’re curious about your goals and dreams, and they wish to determine you advance to the best variety of your self — not just the things you think they would like to see.

Finally, healthy lovers know how to discuss difficult topics and are able to solve clash without blaming or shaming each other. This can include things like funds, fidelity, parenting styles, and more.